The Day George W. Bush Confessed

I went on a journey with George W. Bush. Well, it was less of a journey and more of a confession. I was dressed as a Roman Catholic priest with a white pressed collar, and he asked me if he could confess. I said, “Let’s find a church.” He agreed, and we walked into one in Santa Fe, New Mexico. It had an old, dusty confessional that seemed like it had not been used in a while. I made the sign of the Cross and he surprisingly greeted me with the words, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. This is my first confession.” My voice shook a bit, but I told him to proceed even though I didn’t even know if he was Catholic. He said he needed forgiveness for a lot of things. I told him to start small, and we could get to the bigger things. With that, he started telling his sins. “I confess I should not have dodged the Vietnam War when I was young,” I said. I reminded him that those years were a difficult time, and many had failed to answer the call, so I asked him to continue. “I didn’t win the 2000 presidential election, and I shouldn’t have taken office. Vice President Al Gore won that election.” “Really,” I said. Bush went on to say, “Gore won the popular vote and the Electoral College is just an archaic remnant of our slave past.” I took a deep breath. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, but I asked him to go on. “The Supreme Court should not have voted in my favor,” he said. “I lost, and I should have done the honorable thing and let Gore be President,” he whispered. To try to contain my beating heart, I told him that I was there to help him make a good confession. If he was unsure or uneasy, then he should ask me for help. I told him to place his trust in God, a merciful Father who wants to forgive him. He then sighed in a way that I had never heard anyone do before, and he told me that the terrorist attacks on September 11 scared him like nothing else in his life. He realized that he was not meant to be President. He didn’t have the experience or wisdom to lead a country that was hurting so profoundly. “I did the only thing I knew how to,” he said. “I acted out of fear. I mobilized our military instead of reflecting on why people would want to harm us in such a horrific way. I should have mobilized our hearts,” he said. Coughing a bit, he said, “I thought strength meant that I needed to go to war. So I started the war on terror and the creation of the Department of Homeland Security. In 2001, I ordered the invasion of Afghanistan to try to overthrow the Taliban, destroy al-Qaeda, and capture Osama bin Laden. So many died because of me. I am so sorry.” Beyond the confessional window, I could hear him sniffling. I asked him if there was anything else that he wanted to confess. He said in a low voice, “I lied.” “What did you lie about?” “Saddam never had weapons of mass destruction or ties with al-Qaeda. I made that all up. What was I thinking? So many suffered. I didn’t even let the press cover the coffins coming home in the hundreds, draped in US flags. American boys and women lost their lives or lost limbs and minds because of it. Hundreds of thousands of Iraqis died. The country’s century-old historical buildings were destroyed. What did I do?” He was shaking now and was having difficulty speaking. He ended by saying, “This is all I can remember. I am sorry for these and all my sins.” What I remembered from my childhood Catholic upbringing was that I was supposed to offer him penance. The penance takes into account his situation and supports his spiritual good. It may be a prayer, an offering, works of mercy, service, or sacrifice. I knew whatever the penance, he should be joined in some way to Christ and the cross. While I thought I asked him to pray as an act of contrition.

My God,

I am sorry for my sins with all my heart.

In choosing to do wrong

and failing to do good,

I have sinned against you

whom I should love above all things.

I firmly intend, with your help,

to do penance,

to sin no more,

and to avoid whatever leads me to sin.

Our Savior Jesus Christ

suffered and died for us.

In His name, my God, have mercy.

As I thought of his penance, I promised myself to never wear a priest’s collar for Halloween ever again. What penance would be appropriate for all of these sins? What would you say? All I could do was make the sign of the Cross and say, “Amen.”